Goals

So many goals... so little time.

I wonder if I'll be able to reach the ones that I really want. It seems like yesterday that I had just graduated from college (undergrad) and started looking for a full time job in my field of choice at the time that would set me up on the career path that I wanted to take. 

That was about 11 or so years ago. My career path wasn't exactly clearly defined at the time... actually, I was just hoping to get a foot in the door at company where I could just work. About 4 months after graduating from college, I got a job working at a health care center as a receptionist and I considered taking steps working towards a career in that field, since my degree was somewhat health related (I majored in Psychology and was I interested in mental "health").

Plans changed, after I realized that it wasn't for me.

I ended up working at Barnes and Noble for awhile after that, and now I'm working for a gov't contractor. Being an analyst provides me with some mental stimulation, as I have to find anomalies in some of the work I do (and then weed them out), but it's not all it's cracked up to be. It's fine for now, though.

I guess I was just thinking about how when you are young you have so many goals and dreams and aspirations in your life, and sometimes it takes you awhile to get going on them. I don't regret any of the jobs I've had or the path I've taken in my life so far - I think I've learned a lot and I've grown as a person as a result of that. But I'm highly interested at this point in time in taking a sharp turn away from everything I've been doing and move on to something else. 

I've been delaying the inevitable. 

I think fear takes over sometimes and prevents us from reaching out and taking steps towards our dream goals. I know it has for me. But I'm getting too old and too frustrated to just accept my life the way it is and keep going. There's still a lot of time left. 

Hmmm. Perhaps I'll meditate on it tonight, and see where my crazy analytical brain takes me.

PS - Sorry if this post sounds a little vague... it's just how my brain is working this evening.